Cocaine Princess here.It's been pretty quiet up here at least on my end. Hmm, maybe it has to do with the lazy days of summer.
For the past week in one of the local newspapers a different list appeared everyday on a variety of subjects. Since I really have nothing new to share- unless you're dying to read about the cute pair of leopard printed peep toe sandals and matching purse I bought (because a girl can NEVER have too many shoes or purses) and then popped into the pet store and bought a little hottie mermaid statue for Nemo, Marlin and Dory, I thought I would share some of the lists with you starting with one that was written by the paper's food critic.
"11 Things Restaurants Do To Rip You Off "
1. RUSHED SEATING
Not informing you over the phone about a two-hour seating limit.
2. ICED TEA
Slipping ice cubes into the teapot to cool it down quickly.
3. WINE GOUGING
The insane three-to-one markup on alcohol ($62 for a 2006 Altesino Rosso that retails for $19.95 at the LCBO).
4. 10 PER CENT FOLKINESS
Appealing to you with the word "homemade" rather than disclosing just how much has been store-bought.
5. GOOD SOAKING
Selling you a $9 bottle of water and then constantly topping up your glass so you'll order another.
6. LAZY SUNDAY
Serving burnt, dry food for brunch because locals are too tired/lazy/hungover to know/care.
7. PRICEY BOOZE
Any cocktail that costs more than $15.
8. CROWDED HOUSE
Over-seating. Squeezing 60 seats into a 40-seat room so that every couple is sharing a single, cacophonous conversation.
9. TOUCHY FEELY
Sexy servers touching you on the shoulder (and restaurants asking would-be servers to include headshots with their resumés).
10. FAKE SUSHI
Tilapia sold as red snapper, and rectangle-moulded, red-painted pollock (surimi) sold as crab.
11. XXXX-VILLE
Valet parking can't disguise a whole *neighborhood of restaurants that ought to be rounded up in a paddy wagon and run in on racketeering charges.
*The neighborhood of restaurants the critic is referring to is the poshest area in the city where you will find all the best hotels, stores and restaurants. Just think Rodeo Drive. The valet parking begins at $35-45 and can go as high as $75. Frigging ridiculous isn't it?!
XOXOXOXO,
Cocaine Princess
