A while back my sister decided to volunteer me to help out at her school of all days on a Saturday. I like to consider Saturdays as my Me Time but "A" had other ideas. The night before sister said to me:
"Darling, you do remember what tomorrow is?"
"Unless the days of the week have changed tomorrow is Saturday," I giggled.
"Make sure you go to bed early. You need to be in the gymnasium by 8am. You are on volunteering duty, remember?"
I will be the first to admit that I don't always listen to what she is saying to me. I listen to bits and pieces and if she does mention something at a later date, I'll think back and say, "okay, I remember she mentioned something about that." But this time I swear my lovelies she made no mention about this business of her volunteering me, which was done without my consent I might add! Believe me, I would have remembered some part of the conversation: gym....volunteer....Saturday.
Picture the following scene taking place in the kitchen:
I was in a really cute outfit and in my hands I was holding a bowl of tangerines and sister was doing what she does best: lecturing me after I made it clear to her I had no idea what she was talking about.
"I told you 2 weeks ago and I have been telling you everyday for the past week to keep this Saturday clear."
"No you didn't."
"Yes I did and the reason you don't remember is because- "
Oh God here it comes!
"You never listen to me."
Here's an idea: why not just carry around a sign that reads "My sister never listens to me."
Of course I never said that but hell I was thinking it. The "me never listening" lecture went on and on. I was leaning against the fridge and with my eyes closed banging the back of my head gently. I tried clicking my heels like Dorothy which I have tried doing numerous times on different occasions. It has yet to work but I thought I'd give it a try anyways and that time I was barefoot.....No luck! Don't get me wrong I love "A" but her lectures are so tiring. I know all her lectures by heart that I even know at precisely what point during her lectures she will stop talking so she can look me dead straight in the eyes to ask whether I'm paying attention to what she is saying, or if I'm pretending to? I usually give her the same response: "Yes, yes I'm listening" while I throw in a couple of head nods.
"Why did you go and volunteer me?" I asked.
"Do you have something else better to do on a Saturday?"
"As a matter of fact I do."
"It involves you shopping, right?"
"No, you're wrong Miss Smarty Pants. I'll be spending the day at the salon," I replied back.
"It's one Saturday and I expect you to be there."
If you could have only heard her tone....."and I expect you to be there." Sheesh, she used a very authoritative tone with me. A tone I don't like.
"And what if I don't go?"
"Then the group I assigned you with, Froggie, Pint Size Dictator, Britney Spears wannabe and the others will be very disappointed when they find out you're a no show. I already told them you're coming."
Sister plays dirty doesn't she?
"I'm assigned to them?" I questioned.
"I know how much you like them and they like you too but if going to the salon is more important than nurturing and enriching the lives of the younger generation....well, I'll just get somebody else to volunteer in your place, although I'm not sure if I'll be able to find anybody on such short notice."
Again, sister plays dirty, real dirty.
"What did you volunteer me for this time? It's not bingo caller again is it?"
"You're in charge of arts and crafts and-"
I cut her off.
"AND? There's an and?"
"And you'll be watching a movie with them."
"Oh my God you volunteered me for 2 things?"
"How hard is it to put in a DVD and sit and watch a movie with them?"
"Why arts and crafts?
"What's the matter darling, are you worried you might chip the polish off your nails?"
Good grief I hadn't even thought about that! I let out a deep sigh followed by a groan. My relaxing day of "me time" was postponed and instead I would be spending the entire Saturday in a gymnasium gluing pasta shells onto construction paper.
....To Be Continued....
*****
My loyal and dear readers the end of the week is here and with a cheer I say, it's finally Friday.
Whatever your plans are have a tremendous weekend.-x
XOXOXOXO,
Cocaine Princess
