Cocaine Princes here.
I've been sidetracked the last week or so (attending Madonna's concert) I forgot to post 4 Horrible Things Pt. II
To review:
There were two more things with my name on it in white business sized envelopes. I looked at the return address. 'Oh God,' I said out loud. 'What do they want now?' 'Who?' questioned 'A.' Instead of answering her I gave myself a nasty paper cut opening the envelope and pulling out the letter. Midway through reading it I said out loud, 'crap!' Horrible Thing #3. I then opened the second envelope….. 'Double crap!' Horrible Thing #4
'What?' my sister asked. 'What is so horrible?!' 'These two letters,' I replied holding them both up in each hand. 'I can't read that far.' She held out her hand so I gave her the first letter. She read through it. 'What is so horrible about this?' she questioned. 'What's so good about it?' I questioned back. 'You've been selected for jury duty.'
Yes bloggers it's true. Once again I've been selected for jury duty. Yes I know it's my civic duty as so many of you pointed out before but it doesn't mean I have to like it.
"Dear Prospective Juror,
Your name was selected at random from a municipal enumeration
list to be considered for inclusion in a Jury Roll..."
'Why me? Why did my name get picked again? Why not your name?' I asked while looking at 'A.' 'Maybe next time my name will get picked.' 'That’s what you said last time.' 'If there was a way for me to take your place I would.' 'You also said that last time too,' I reminded her. 'What does the other letter say?' 'It’s bad.' I answered. 'What happened, did your favorite mall close down?' she teased. 'No and that's not funny.' If that ever did happen not only would it be considered a horrible thing but also a devastating thing!
I handed the second letter to 'A' and warned her it was horrible news. After reading it she said, 'this is not as horrible as you think it is.' 'Did you read all of it?' 'Yes.' 'Word for word?' She nodded yes. 'What am I suppose to do?' I asked. 'You don’t have much of a choice. You’re going to have to go,' she answered.
So what was in that particular letter? I'll tell you tomorrow. Just kidding. If you recall I received 2 traffic tickets in the summer: one for speeding and the other running through a stop sign.
In November I must appear in traffic court to show cause why my driver's license should not be suspended.
'I receive 2 traffic convictions in my entire life and one of them was when I had to pick you up from the hospital,' I commented. 'I don't understand why I have to go? I only have 6 demerit points. 9 points is when they ask to see you. At 6 they send you a letter of warning.' (That letter I did receive) And then all of a sudden I had a thought I said out loud, 'what am I going to wear when I go?' 'Oh my God,' my sister mumbled. 'Let’s focus on one thing at a time and after you can decide on your wardrobe.' 'I can tell you right now I’m not appearing for jury duty, I can't. It’s on the same day as my traffic court date.' She looked at the letters again. 'You’re right but you still need to notify them to explain your absence.'
UPDATE:
There's good news and bad news. First the GOOD news:
I got out of jury duty. Actually it’s great news! Had I gone and been picked I would have been a juror for a trial taking place in the city, a place where the population sits at a little over 2 million Out of 2 million plus people somehow my name got randomly selected.
And now the BAD news:
I still must appear in traffic court. I've been told the whole matter will be taking place in the form of an interview. I feel queasy thinking about it.
They say if you're kind and affectionate to the universe, the universe will reward you. I've been very loving to the universe and everyday I try my best to stay in an optimistic frame of mind. So I'm trying to make sense why the universe is punishing me. Could it be the one time 'A' dragged me against my will to go grocery shopping with her and I ate that one grape? Maybe the universe mistook that as shoplifting?
Dear Universe,
I was only testing to see if the bunch was sweet. My sister is the one who told me to, honest!
If only now I was struck with the chicken pox rather than during the summer.
XOXOXOXO,
Cocaine Princess
29 comments:
You are really too sweet -- Seriously -- My personal belief is the Universe doesn't punish, but uses the normal, everyday things of life to enhance us, but only if we let them -- You never know who you might meet, or see or...
Good stuff is coming your way :)
Just dress as classy as you are smile softly explain your situation (about it being your sisters fault!!!) *wink* then tell them that you're happy to just hire her as your driver in paybacks. :) You're too beautiful to get in trouble.... just make sure you say YES your HONOR no matter what. worked for me. Hugs- glad to see you're back.
Aw.. your little grape plea to the universe is cute. :) Well, at least you didn't get jury duty. I'd go celebrate at your favorite mall :)
Your mistake was paying the two tickets, that's why you're in this mess.
'what am I going to wear when I go?'
Wear something low cut with heels...
I'm just messing with you Princess, it's the flavored vodka talking.
You'll be fine.
Peace out chickie.
Princess be glad you had the chicken pox in the summertime. Otherwise if you had gotten ill now you may not have been able to go to the concert.
k.p.williams
newlywedcentral at 9:31,
Thank you.
bambi at 9:35.
Thank you. I joked with my sister that I plan on putting the blame on her.
miss caught up at 9:50,
I'd rather go for Jury Duty than do the other thing.
newbie at 9:52,
Thank you for your compassionate choice of words.
k.p. at 11:04,
I never thought of that.
Leave it to newbie to come up with that comment.
You're not in any 'mess'
9:52--Sheesh!
Ignore his comment Princess.
How's the weather where you live?
Ya gotta hate the scary looking white business envelopes. Geez, if it comes from traffic court it's not even as bad as it could be.
Anonymous at 2:35,
+3C and very windy.
4:08, agreed. It's not as bad as it sounds Princess.
Newbie would be any psychiatrists' dream come true.
9:52- What mess?
Newbie do you enjoy pushing kids off swings?
Penalties dramatically effect a persons' right to drive and their insurance rates go up. Even a minor speeding ticket has more penalties than just the fine.
Guys I'm telling it like it is. The Princess needs to know and needs a little toughening up.
9:13, I don't push kids off swings.
Newbie I appreciate your comment
but just so you know I’m well aware of everything.
What makes you think I need toughening up?
Why was paying the tickets a mistake newbie? And what are you a newbie at?
Princess like most good and decent parents I am sure your mother at some point told you “never talk to strangers.” Consider newbie a “stranger.” The boy is strange-- plain and simple.
Anonymous at 8:30,
I'm sure newbie means well although he could have said it in a more delicate way.
'What makes you think I need toughening up?'
'I'm sure newbie means well although he could have said it in a more delicate way.'
Princess you're too soft and a bit too girly.
newbie at 9:38,
Yes I am and I can tell you right now no man has ever complained about me being too soft or too girly.
Princess re-read the comment left at 8:30 and take it to heart.
9:52-- Newbie makes a point.
I agree with you Princess-- his comment left at 9:52 should have been phrased more tactfully.
I find this commical. First of all I never get called for jury duty because I don't vote. I am not on the voter registration rolls, so problem #1 solved.
As for problem #2, civil service must be rolling in doe in Canada. We are so cash strapped here in the lower United States that they don't even issue speeding tickets. They have 'speed traps' that take you picture and "send" you a ticket in the mail. They don't want you to show up in court, you are encouraged to just send in the money, or take a defensive driving course for half the fine (and a wasted 8 hours). If you never pay any of the tickets you get, they will issue a warrant for your arrest which will only be valid if you get pulled over by an actual police officer, which rarely happens here.
You should just move to Phoenix.
Bruce at 5:07,
If it hadn't been for that ONE time I voted I never would be on the voters registration list.
The Princess in trouble with the law?!?! Say it ain't so!!
Did the boys in blue pull you over with lights and flashing sirens?
Anonymous at 11:39,
The first ticket I received was over Labor Day Weekend and the police were doing spot checks. A police officer holding a radar on the side of the road signaled me to pull over.
The second ticket came with lights and sirens. The police cruiser came out of nowhere.
Ugg -- I know how you feel.
If it's any consolation that's a lovely photo you posted for this entry!
It can't be all that bad. I mean, let's think this through. You show up, they make you wait in a line probably so you do...then of course you will have to use the restroom...which will not be the most delightful of restrooms...then you'll get back in line, behind an 80 year old man with a smoker's cough...and you'll wait some more...you'll have to decide if you are going to have lunch out of the vending machine...hmmm donuts or chips for lunch?...but then they'll call your name, you'll walk in, they will spew out a bunch of mumbo jumbo legal talk and you will smile and they will decide to just give you a warning. ha ha
michelle at 10:57,
That is so funny!
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