Hasta La Vista!

Cocaine Princess here.

I know you're all waiting with bated breath so without further delay here is part 2 but just to review--

SISTER: They’re cats darling, not a den of lions. You do know the difference, right?

ME: Yes! Just go see for yourself.

SISTER: Fine, I will right now.

I followed her into the kitchen........and then outside.

The exact same thing those cats did to me, they did to sister.

ME: I told you so.

I’m not going to lie, it felt good saying I told you so to sister. Believe me, it’s not often that I’m able to.

Part 2

SISTER: She's just being over protective of her babies.

ME: What does she want from us? A medal with the words "World's Best Cat Mom" engraved? Can't you just get rid of them?

SISTER: I'll see what I can do.

2 DAYS LATER

Nothing was accomplished. Not that sister didn't try because she did but nothing seemed to work and that's when we called in the big guns aka Animal Control. As one loyal commenter posted, animal control too suggested we turn the hose on them. I for one was more than happy to do it. With the spray nozzle in my hand I turned the dial to full power. Hasta La Vista! It was sheer pleasure watching the cats jump and screech their way off the patio and run away. Seriously, those damn cats didn't know what hit them. I'm not too sure where they went but needless to say I was glad they were gone.

THE MORNING AFTER

I open up the patio blinds and quoting a line from Poltergeist II I said to sister, "They're baaack!"

Apparently those damn cats didn’t seem to take a hint and not only that but they decided to get revenge on us by, well how do I explain this delicately? You know what? Forget that. There’s no delicate way around it. I’m just going to say it, those damn cats pooped and p*ssed all over the patio! Who do these damn cats think they are? Don’t they know I’m at the top of the food chain? I put in another call to Animal Control who suggested we turn the hose on them again. I explained that we had tried that already.

ME: It’s not working, they returned. What are we suppose to do, leave the sprinklers on 24/7?

I then questioned animal control why it wasn't possible for someone to come by and just pick up the damn cats? If you’re wondering why I keep referring to the cats as ‘those damn cats,’ it’s because that’s what I’ve decided to call the pesky furballs. Brilliant I know.

Their response?

ANIMAL CONTROL: All we can do is put your name on a waiting list.

Me: A waiting list? Just exactly how many other people are having this same problem?

ANIMAL CONTROL: Oh you'd be surprised.

ME: What is the point of you guys then? Aren’t you in the business of controlling animals?

ANIMAL CONTROL: We only make immediate house calls if there happens to be an endangered species at risk.

Me: Endangered species? So like if someone reported a Bengal tiger was pinned underneath their car animal control would respond right away?

ANIMAL CONTROL: Yes, that would be a good example.

ME: Let me ask you a question-- how many calls do you receive from people on average per day in this region reporting an endangered species at risk on their property or for that matter how many calls do you get about a Bengal tiger running around in their neighborhood?

ANIMAL CONTROL: It’s possible. 

ME: Really? I had no idea tigers were known to roam around Canada. You think they're friends with Tony the Tiger?

ANIMAL CONTROL: A tiger could always escape from the zoo and wreck havoc in a neighborhood.

To Be Continued.

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My loyal and dear readers, it's finally Friday.

Whatever your plans are have a fantastic weekend.~x

XOXOXOXO,

Cocaine Princess