Friday, February 26, 2010

WINTER VAYCAY: Dinner: The Sitarist & His Chant

Cocaine Princess here.

It was Christmas Eve and I thought again about the theme's party while looking at the dinner table. I looked across at the "actors" and God knows why but I even looked over at The Panamanian and his wife who were thankfully seated further down from where I was, then I looked at the Ravi Shankar wanna-be. Mr. Sitarist was sitting on his rug quietly with his eyes closed. I couldn't quite decide whether the party was:

A} Bizarre
B} Odd
C} Weird


As I tried to determine between A to D cousin re-appeared. “Well, well, well, look who decided to show, Mr. David Copperfield.” “I had a phone call to make,” he said finding his seat and sitting down. “How convenient,” I replied. “I call it perfect timing,” he said back. As he continued talking I knew very well there was “no phone call.” He had gone outside to avoid listening to the “entertainment portion” of the night and spent the time smoking and not on the phone. Judging from the stench that was coming off of him I think he smoked the entire pack and called him on it. "What do you want me to do?" he asked. "Pop a breath mint and maybe if you Febreeze yourself it might get rid of some of the smell," I suggested. "You know, you discriminate against smokers Princess. We have rights." Cousin began fidgeting with his tie and loosened it a little and was itching to get out his 3 Piece Cage. The 3 Piece Cage is what he refers to when he has to wear a suit and tie. He picked up The Leaning Tower Of Pisa name card holder next to him and said damn! when he read who was sitting there.  "Hey do me a favor and switch seats with Valentina. After covering for you with The Host there's no telling what she's got planned for me." "Are you scared of her?" I questioned. "Sadly yes. You know the way she can get." Oh boy do I ever "She may actually sic the gringo marine on me." "Tsk, tsk, tsk. You and Valentina really like throwing the G-word don't you?" I remarked. "Look around see any of them around?" "That's not the point. It's just not a very nice word," I explained. Cousin laughed a little. "You've been spending too much time over there when you ought to be spending more time here in the homeland and not just on the holidays......What do you say? Switch seats. She'll never know." I informed him it was too late. Valentina was already aware of the seating arrangement and had excused herself. "Where did she go?" "All she said was she would be right back," I answered and then all of a sudden the sitarist spoke and by that I meant he began to chant:  OM....OM.... over and over. Those who had made their way to the dinner table didn't know quite what to think and became very still and quiet. So quiet you could hear a pin drop. Hmm, I take that back. You might have been able to hear a pin drop if it hadn't been for the wannabe Ravi Shankar and his chanting. And here I thought this night couldn't get any more bizarre, odd or weird. He sat cross legged with his hands palms facing up high in the air, eyes closed and while he chanted I let out a giggle. Oh God not again!! Cousin turned to me and whispered, "You have got a serious giggling problem, don't ya?" I nodded yes and turned the other way and kept my head down as the dinner guests were being entertained just as the individual salads were being served. When he finished I took a couple of deep and silent breaths and was back to myself. Cousin asked if I was okay. I told him yes and then in a very sarcastic tone he said, "I can't wait to see what he does next." He could do whatever he wanted I thought to myself as long as it wasn't anything that made me giggle uncontrollably....which at that point was next to impossible.  Cousin asked a question. "How are you liking your evening so far?" It was a fair question. It took me a couple of minutes to come up with an answer as I reviewed the many delightful highlights of the evening..... I was confident and was ready to give him an honest answer. "I can honestly say this is one Christmas Eve that will definitely go down in history with me." "What will go down in history?" questioned Valentina. She had finally returned with the same glass she left with in her hands. "Where do you go?" "There was a spot on my glass. I went back into the kitchen and had that waiter re-wash it for me to my satisfaction," she replied. "Oh God you didn't?" It was a stupid question of me to ask because of course she did. "Why are you tormenting him?" I asked. Her answer: "For kicks and because I'm bored." "And whose fault is that?" inquired cousin. "You guys could have been in St. Croix." "That's right!" I said in agreement. Picking up her salad fork she jabbed cousin in the arm with it a couple of times and told him, "stop causing trouble." I let out a little sigh while I thought how awesome it would have been to celebrate Christmas in St. Croix.....Christmas in St. Croix had such a nice ring to it that it just rolled off my tongue so sweetly. I was about to say it a few times in a row just to annoy Valentina but I was interrupted by guess who? Good grief the chanting had begun again. "Is he off his medication?" asked my bf. You have to admit it was a fair question and if he was it would have explained plenty. "If he isn't on any type of meds he may want to start," Cousin said back.

Unlike the rest of the evening the food we dined on was probably the only thing that wasn't bizarre, odd or even weird. It was pure perfection and everything was delish. The one downside: the sitarist and his frigging chant. He would chant and then stop and then chant again in 10 minute intervals. I had to force myself and it was really hard but I managed to tune him out otherwise I would have been giggling non-stop. The rest of the guests did exactly the same. He was too much! As we ate Valentina kept asking question after question about The Sitarist. Why was he chanting? Why was he sitting on the floor and not eating at the table? Out of all the instruments, why the sitar?  Her queries about him were never ending and had begun to bug cousin. "What are you asking me for? Do I look the man with the answers? If you're that interested, go ask him yourself." And that's exactly what she did. She backed out of her chair and approached him. "She's unbelievable," muttered cousin. We tried to make out what she was saying but couldn't hear a thing. The conversation didn't last very long and when she made her way back to her seat, she picked up her fork and proceeded to finish dinner. I looked at Cousin and he looked at me. Hey, we were dying to know his answers! "Well?" I curiously asked. She finished her bite and after taking a sip replied. "I asked him one question after introducing myself. What's with the chanting? and His highness requested he not be disturbed while eating." By the look on her face I could tell she wasn't too pleased and I was right. "He DISTURBED us for 20 minutes and he can't answer one question? If anyone is doing the disturbing it's him and I'm going to go tell him that." Cousin grabbed a hold of her arm as she was about to get up again. "Leave the guy alone, will ya? Be glad he's only chanting and not playing his instrument." His chanting was just as off key as his playing the sitar.

It was past midnight when the amazing Christmas Eve dinner party came to an end. I was in bed and as soon as my head hit the pillow I began to slowly drift off to sleep. I was afraid after my stimulating evening I would be too hyper to sleep! Valentina crawled into bed with me and wanted to know if I was angry with her. "Angry? Why would I be angry? Other than the fact we could have been celebrating Christmas in St. Croix instead of Sandbox Island or because you told people I was an alcoholic?" I giggled a little. There's nothing she could ever do that could make me become angry with her and besides as I told cousin:  this was one Christmas Eve that will definitely go down in history with me........ and then I giggled a little more thinking about Mr. Sitarist and his chant.

....To Be Continued 


As I post this blog we up here are under a severe winter storm watch. Snow, freezing rain and strong winds are heading are way. Wow it's going to be one awesome weekend!

My loyal and dear readers it's finally FRIDAY!

Whatever your plans are have a superb weekend.-x

Cocaine Princess


Anonymous said...

What did you eat for dessert?

Cocaine Princess said...

Anonymous at 9:33,
A slice of Neapolitan cake and vanilla tartufo.

Bruce said...

Maybe I just haven't been reading long enough, but have you 'ever' been to a party or get together that you actually enjoyed, that wasnt' full of drama, nar-do-wells, or freaks?

I guess the questions is this. Every been to any 'kick-ass' the one where Slyde almost burned his house down on New Years?

(have a great weekend!)

Cocaine Princess said...

Bruce at 2:41,

I'm surprised Slyde didn't film the party/fire and upload the footage on youtube.

The Constant Complainer said...

It was actually snowing in Las Vegas yesterday, CP. Can you believe that!!! LOL. I thought of that as I read about your winter storm warning.